Tuesday, June 26, 2007

I See Celebrities...

It is a well-known fact among my friends that I like to play a little game called, "I spy a celebrity"...I am often reporting in how I saw Barbara Bush, Madonna, James Brown, etc., at the corner store. Most everyone disregards my celebrity spotting as mere entertainment...and, the truth be known, I'm really NOT seeing these people, but folks who remind me of them in their dress or character. I mean, any old grey-haired woman with a nice dress and a string of pearls around her neck will suffice as a "Barbara Bush" sighting. LOL

Sooooo...the story I am about to tell you is true...I really DID run into a big screen celebrity this past week! Honest. It was him! And the fact this movie actor really DOES live in Seattle makes my story all the more plausible...seriously. And no...it was not the late Kurt Cobain or Courtney Love.

But let me tell my latest celebrity spotting with the drama it so deserves...

I was out on my "just kill me now" walk last week through the neighborhood and tiny urban village I reside in...I have mapped out a most excruciating walking course, down to Lake Washington and back up the hillside to my home. The entire walk is only about 2.6 miles, but the final .6 miles of the walk is STRAIGHT UP HILL...thus my "just kill me now" title for this walk.

I generally wear my MP3 player, a Seattle Seahawks cap, and my walking attire, which consists of any old ratty T-shirt and pants I can find that isn't molded in the hamper. The cap is to shield my balding head from the brief rays of sunlight that might infiltrate through the overhead cloud mass and potentially burn my precious scalp...it also serves as a screen for my eyes so I can look down and avoid making eye contact with anyone I run into (literally) on the sidewalk. LOL

I have found Seattle residents have very limited sidewalk etiquette and often do not move to the side of the walk when approached...if I am appearing to look down, they fear for their safety that this large, pasty-white woman might just mow them down unaware of their presence in my path. I like it that way...they tremble at the sight of me.

Sooooo, I'm walking in this fashion through the business area of Madrona, cap on, bee-bopping to my music, when I happen to look up and see two, inconsiderate males standing in the middle of my path about a half a block away. Little old ladies I will pause for...large men who should be more courteous, look out...I WILL run you over. And this was my strategy for these two obstacles ahead.

I put my head down and pick up my pace with the fierceness of a bull about to impale a matador and approached my target with the intensity only a fat, sweating and overly-hormonal female can do. Just as I am bearing down on my targets and about to bump one of the men off the side walk and into the street parallel the cement, I happen to look up...mostly just to be witness to the look of surprise these two unknowing gentlemen were about to have.

And just as I glance upward (probably smiling a bit too widely for the circumstance...I mean I am sweating AND I am exercising...LOL), one of the men happens to look in my direction. Seconds before a collision of roller derby proportions, this somewhat grey haired man says, "Oh! Excuse me!" and steps to the side of the walkway, but not before we lightly brush elbows.

And this is where I am suddenly aware I have nearly taken out Sheriff James Brock, of "Picket Fences"!!! Yep, it was the Tom Skerritt...movie star and evening drama performer. This guy:
I know I should have asked him for his autograph...this is the ONLY way some of you will believe my "brush with fame" story. But I didn't...I decided to simply stand there awe-struck and stammer out the words, "Oh, pardon ME!" This was the extent of my brilliance...a big ol' apology for not seeing HIM in my walking path. LOL

Could you imagine the headlines had I really MOWED him over?!? "Tom Skerritt is injured in freak accident by a deranged Seattlite" or "Seattlite Tom Skerritt is accidentally injured by a freak"...either way, I'm sure I would have been staring down the throat of some kind of celebrity lawsuit!

But don't worry though...you WILL be the first to know if I ever run into the the late Kurt Cobain up here...LOL...


mdmhvonpa said...

See, now, if you stumbled and 'twisted' your ankle you might have gotten a 1st date out of him!

Anonymous said...

To think he missed out on that chance meeting with Anglelina Beavermartin......

Silverstar said...

Neat story. Guess it made the "just kill me now walk" a little more bearable eh?

Peej said...

LOL! I can't see why running down a celebrity is off limits but running down regular citizens fills you with glee. LOL!! You're a prize. :)

I tripped over that guy who was "McCloud" (and was also in Gunsmoke) once at the airport. He had to have been about 6'5" and his legs were straight out in the aisle. And.... well...I'm a klutz. He's dead now but I swear I had nothing to do with that!! ;)

Also, when I worked at the airline giftshop I waited on Joan Rivers once.... Her husband Edgar was there too. He's also dead... Hmmm... Do I spot a trend here?

I sold Ted Kennedy a couple of magazines and a pack of Juicy Fruit gum too but I don't think he counts as a celebrity, just a jerk. Oh, and he's not dead :)

Celebrity sightings are fun. Hope you don't run into Kurt... he must look kind of "rumpled" by now.



"TWISTED" you say?!? Me or you? LOL




Yes, this is true...and I'm sure Angelina would NOT have been as impressed to see him as I was! LOL




There is little that makes this walk bearable...except maybe alcohol!




So you really DO see dead people?!? LMAO


Have myelin? said...

Neat! I actually know of him! Not know him, know 'of' him. That counts. I think he's kinda cute.

I've met celebrities. Have some amusing stories too but you'll have to ask for them. LOL.




So???? I'm asking! LOL Give us the skinny on YOUR celeb stories...

Inquiring minds want to know.


Peej said...

Miss Cheese.... Yes, I suppose you could say "See Peej and die!" LOL!

Wonder if they're dying happy???