Thursday, May 14, 2009
The Egyptians May Have Been On To Something...
...Had they only applied the *mummy wrap* on LIVE subjects, that is!
Yeah, I know this sounds hokie and perhaps even a bit out there...but, as is typical, I'm gonna say it anyway. Y'all are aware I've been enduring some fairly moderate to intense neuralgia in my right arm, yes? At first sign of pain in my forearm, I was suspicious a return of shingles was upon me because the pain felt like that particular skin-sensitive-my-arm's-on-fire pain that I have HAD in my right forearm just before an outbreak of shingles there.
Well, luckily (I guess?) no blisters have erupted on my forearm as of yet (and I no longer am suspicious of shingles), but the pain did travel up into the back of my right, flabby upper arm as well...this particular area of the pain has been giving me fits because it is difficult to AVOID touching anything (ah, like clothing?!?) to this area.
My never-seeming-to-tire-of-my-whining neuro ARNP (perhaps she should be known as Nurse NSTTOMW since I already have a Dr. SWWNBN?) suggested Neurontin or Lyrica yesterday for pain management (but I suspect this was REALLY a suggestion of desperation to shut me up!), and I DID try the Neurontin against my better judgment.
Also out of pure desperation (because I was needing to shut me up, too) I rooted around like a swine searching truffles in my old first aid drawer (ALL nurses have one of these...confiscated equipment, splints, wraps, bandages for those first aid needs), looking for an old elastic bandage I KNEW existed when I was treated for tennis elbow a few year's ago. And no, I've never played tennis in my life...leave it.
I located the moth infested device and decided to give it a try on my right elbow (gawd knows why...I was desperate)...slipping it on was the worst part that created the most pain (yes, I DID use that borrowed swear word, Have Myelin...the F-tard one!). After only a short amount of time though, I SWORE I was feeling some relief from the pain (or highly delusional from it at this point). I wore this darned thing around most of the afternoon and evening and, I have to say, my arm was feeling BETTER!
Now, I'm sure Nurse NSTTOMW and Dr. SWWNBN would most likely attribute my slight symptom relief to the Neurontin/Neurotten...after all, I suspect Dr. SWWNBN owns stock in the pharmaceutical company (but not my ARNP...I doubt Dr. SWWNBN PAYS her enough to purchase stock options...just my opinion of the medical biz and appropriation of funds/pay, but I digress). But, as is typical, the Neurontin/Morontin started giving me that strange head buzz after only two doses...so, as is also typical, I QUIT taking it!
I was a bit disappointed my elastic splint was so tiny and would only cover a portion of my upper forearm and elbow, because the area directly UNDER the elastic band DID feel better...this made me put on my thinking cap (which was now poorly fitting because of all the air space created in my brain from the Neurontin/Neurotten). Back to the first aid drawer I stumbled in search of a jumbo ace wrap I knew must exist in there...my search and rescue efforts paid off...I located a bran-spankin'-new one (I have NO idea how that got in there, since I don't think I've ever purchased an ace wrap in my life...ehem) and removed it from the packaging. I then proceeded to *wind up* my right arm (again using the F-tard word), from near wrist to the top of my flab, somewhat snugly. After the initial pain from the assault wore off, I waited.
And here is where the Egyptian mummy procedure comes in...I gotta tell ya...this darned ace wrap experimentation DOES seem to be helping considerably! And no, it's NOT the Neurontin/Morontin. I have no idea why or how, but it seems by adding snug external pressure to the affected area (most likely the flesh directly encasing my rotted or inflamed nerves), it is TRICKING my failing nervous system into submission!! I know, I know...hokie and all...but it IS working for me. I have no idea if this method of treatment would work for YOU...but if you are experiencing peripheral nerve pain in an extremity, it might be worth a try. Of course, if you are experiencing the *MS Hug*, I DON'T recommend binding up your abdomen...just wouldn't be pretty.
I'm just relieved to FIND some simple relief in at least one area of my aches and pains right now. I can't explain how or why this is helping, but it is...and I really DO suspect the external pressure is somehow tricking my nervous system, at least in my arm for the time being.
Or, maybe I have the ace bandage wound around my arm too tightly and it is cutting off vital blood flow to the nerves in my right arm? (Seriously, I don't, but that sounds shocking, which I tend to go for here)...whatever the case, I was almost considering getting out the chain saw and amputating the appendage myself anyway to relieve the pain (Ah, and THIS thought DID cross my mind, dramatic gesture and all)...