Well, here we go again! WoooHooo! Another round of IV steroids...I'm not sure who sold me my ticket on this wild ride called MS, but I think I'd like my money back. Nobody warned me about all the scary turns and the upside down spins. And even though I'm tall enough to ride this ride, I'd just like the operator to shut it down and let me off...it's made me dizzy and I think I may hurl my lunch!
I'm scheduled once again for another round of IV Solumedrol. It seems the MS has simply turned evil on me...it's eating away my brain at a rather rapid pace. Fortunately, aside from the constant pain I have in my upper trunk (which is ENOUGH of a problem), I haven't lost my eye sight, my ability to walk, the ability to control my own urination, or my sometimes "sick" sense of humor. I thought by now the humor part would have at least left me...some days I feel way too fatigued to think anything is funny.
I told my neurologist I didn't "have time" to be sick and I certainly don't "have time" to schedule another 3 doses of steroids. It's been suggested I "make time". So I made time at the end of my work week next week because I will start a six day furlow on Saturday...it was the best I could do, given my busy schedule! And, as I explained so eloquently to my neurologist, what difference will another seven days make REALLY? The damage is being done as I type or quite possibly even while I have slept this past month.
I'm sick of making time for Multiple Sclerosis in my life. I'm sick of it defining my life. Frankly, I'm just plain sick of it. I have things to do, places to go, stuff to attend to...MS will just have to take a back seat this week. Unfortunately, my MS is like a nasty back seat driver...it's been constantly nagging me and critiquing my navigation and steering. And just when I think I've finally got myself going down an open road, it reminds me of a dangerous "bridge out" just ahead.
I'm considering trying to stick MS in my trunk this week. At least until I get to the IV steroid portion of the drive. I suppose a little duct tape and some rope might help...I think I can ignore it for seven days back there. I just hope no well-wisher hears the pounding on the trunk lid and tries to let it out! I bet the fury of MS would really go after me then...
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