Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Happy Anniversary, Dear MS...You Stinker!...

Six years I've been *officially* married to Multiple Sclerosis. Yes, that's right. I WAS diagnosed on TAX DAY 2003...and again by a second opinion a few months later...and again by a third opinion several months after that (call me paranoid, but I think it's important to REALLY get a cross sample of experts to say the same thing over and over to make it real!).

Yes, today is my 6th anniversary from that bizarre day, sitting across from a total stranger allegedly educated in neurology, and hearing the words, "You definitely have Multiple Sclerosis". He seemed a bit cocky to me now looking back on that day. I was determined to prove him wrong. But, after the THIRD opinion, six long years, and a resigned attitude, I'm finally at a place where I can say, "Yeah, maybe I do have MS".

I doubt my MS is going to send me any flowers or even a card today. Frankly, I'll feel very fortunate to hear nothing from It at all. I doubt anyone else I know will acknowledge this life-changing anniversary either. I mean, seriously...what DO you say to someone on this type of anniversary?

"Wow. Congratulations. You got screwed."

"Happy...I mean CRAPPY anniversary."

"Gee, I'm sorry for your loss?"

"You don't LOOK like you've had MS for six years."

"I'm amazed you two are still together."

"Wow. You're not dead/crippled/contorted/handicapped yet?"

And I'm sure there are a host of other "quality" greetings out there highly appropriate for an MS diagnosis anniversary...as a matter of fact, why don't YOU share some of the better ones you've heard, CHEESE readers? Go ahead...make my day...I'm popping the bubbly now... :-)

11 comments:

  1. Today is Pete's MSiversary too - April 15 1997 for him - 12 long years. Although for him your greetings might not be funny as he is crippled by it. :( Wasn't tax day a bad enough day without adding this?

    I would definitely drink the bubbly though - might as well enjoy yourself today and every day! :)

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  2. Hey! Do you know Jerry Lewis??

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  3. My anniversary is a mystery-- can't quite remember the date, but I believe it happened in May-- so no one has ever separately acknowledged it. We simply tack it onto Mother's Day.

    I hear a lot of "God would never give you more than you could handle..." and "You're doing so well with it" from people who obviously don't have MS.

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  4. MS may not send you flowers and if it did you'd probably be allergic to them, so send some to yourself. Or have chocolate....that's what I do. Or troll my blog for pics of deer poop.

    S.

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  5. I'm going to skip the cliche's cause your other readers are hitting the nail on the head. Instead, I have chosen to drink all the bubbly I can find. LOL !

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  6. I guess all there is left to say is "Happy Anniversary". Just remember we all have one every year so your not alone.

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  7. I don't celebrate my anniversary - Heck, I never acknowledge it. There's the issue of which anniversary -- The definite transverse myelitis/probable MS anniversary on June 18, 1981, or sometime later in October when I got ON and the opthamologist said "Of course you realize that this means you have MS?" anniversary.

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  8. I should have a MS party every year. Cooked brains (mad cow anyone?) with scrambled eggs (ewwwwwww) with a big Martini to get it down.

    Maybe the brains will .... either give us an upset tummy or remind us once again that brains are useful organs (not to be eaten) and don't normally come with holes and lesions.

    Which makes me wonder....do cows get MS?

    Okay I'll go away now.

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  9. I think you need to dump this bastard of a partner and put yourself into child protective services. Why child, you ask? Because you'll always be a babe to us, MS or not.

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  10. I always think of my ex-mother-in-law telling me that I needed to make a living will because I am going to be a vegetable. I can't imagine anyone could ever top that one for me. I sure hope no one does because that was a pretty crappy/stupid thing to say to someone with ANY disease.

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  11. Yes, tax day has never brought me much either. Except the release from crazy people coming to my office. ( If you didn't know I'm an accountant).
    Robert at conquerms.com

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